Danger without the "D" is ANGER. Hills of Hope

I bought this print before Lily was born. I daydreamed incessantly about what it would be like to have a little girl all day every day for 9 months. I was intoxicated by pinkness and sweetness and basked in lovely little images of dresses and pigtails and ballet slippers.

I had originally thought of this painting with the little girl being my Lily and an angel sending her to me.

Now

I think of myself as the little girl and Lily as the angel helping me find my way here.



My children teach me so much. I think, truly, it is because it was not long ago that they were in "His" presence and remember better than I do what was real and what is true.

They know how to forgive so easily. They know what is right so intuitively.

They know how to love unconditionally.



This week I am learning about my path.

There are two paths through life. Love and Hate.

Both motivate.



There have been times I have been motivated by both. Anger and spite are powerful enough to get me going for sure.

There is a path near my house called the pipeline. There are about 3 or 4 hills on this path. I struggle with those hills when I jog. So, I decided to run 'spite' hills. I would think about someone who had hurt me, wronged me or that I was just plain mad at and then muster the gumption to run up that hill with the force and heat of 'hate'.

It worked. I made it up, out of sheer meanness.




I found it worked really great the first time. Yet, all the times after that, well....it started to weaken, wain and wander off somewhere without me. I was left weaker out of breath and out of motivation.

I have a dear friend. She has the integrity of a saint and a heart of gold. She named the hills after her children. As she runs up each hill she thinks of them and what they are in need of and how she can help them and feels the deep love for them that inspires her to run faster and better.

Her last name is "Hill", ironically. Yep, Nik, this one is about YOU. :)



I'm ornery. I'm stubborn. I have been too quick to anger A LOT. Its a weakness, my temperament and propensity to tell people that they can just kiss my running shoes is not good.

I'm changing. I'm going to be better.

Love is just as powerful. Love works better. Love will help me be successful.



This week of mvbl I am grateful for those on my path that have encouraged me, cheered for me, been supportive of me, lead me, inspired me, and helped me every 'literal' step of the way.

I'm actually having a great time. This has been so fun. I am learning so much and having a ball figuring out everything that I can do to make myself healthier.

Gonna take the "Love" route this time. I have a feeling the finish line is just BEAUTIFUL.