Smiling Irony

My college roomate got it right a long time ago. She told me that I have a North Carolina side and a Santa Cruz side. North Carlonia being my 'proper manners' side and Santa Cruz owning the wild side.

Oh, how right she was. Fair warning. This post is grossly narcissistic and even puke inspiringly self oriented. True, its also somewhat reminicent of a post I did on the previous Sacajaweasings, before she was "ing, ing, ing ing".

However, grossly self evaluatory this might be, it keeps re-occuring to me and I feel compelled to put pen to paper, or well, put fingertips to keys again I suppose.

As I have let the big fat 'chronic pain' cat out of the 'proverbial' bag. I may now reveal that while the 'angel side' of debi would love to promise to wear my "Christianity Goggles" through every observaion, well, the "I'm in cronic pain" side gets very irritable. Not exatly hateful, but sincerely witchy with a 'b'.

Its not like I exactly take it out on anyone. I just get that keen taste of flavored spite in my mouth. Bitter and laced with irony and "Ha!, I knew it!" Man, this woMAN, loves being right sometimes.



Okay, I'll make a list. You know you love a 'dishy' list on here.

FOR INSTANCE: and don't tell me you haven't had this moment over and over yourself. :)

The facebook bullet dodge. You know the one where you dig through the photos of ex boyfriends and have that, "Phew....man, I doged a bullet with that one!" 'Hey, I'm glad your doing great now dude, but whoa, ho, am I glad I didn't hitch myself to your wagon bud'

I find it particularily funny when moles strike the well manicured yard and leave the unkempt one alone. I always smile to my 'devilish' self over that one.

I 'inside smirtk' when really good looking people have very 'adverage' looking kids. Its like the gene pool converges and makes a human atoll of unseemly physical charataristics piles all in one little 'bundle of joy/urgliness'.

Marc had a 'singleguy/i can do whatever i want/i am unencumbered/i am rich bachelor salesman in his previous job. He saved up the exact amount of cash to buy an especially special Audi, $80 grand. He offered to take Marc for a 'ride in it like it was a carnival or something. Definately a dude with a 'me' complex. He had the car for a week. He went to a friends house. The lady of the house, his friends wife, opened her garage door and backed into the Audi with her SUV. Totalled the carnival ride car. Yep, I cracked up. Laughed my harty ars off.

I have an especially soft soft spot for failing egomaniacs. I 'dig' with my largest rustiest shovel 'it' when the likes of say...like Bill Clinton, Tiger Woods Charlie Sheen and Jesse James get their proverbial arses handed to them. And Props bigtime to the likes of Sandra Bullock for divorcing him. Finally. Sheesh. Double sheesh.



I laugh when I burn some thing in the oven, I seriously laugh when I fall down accidently, I even gaffauf when I drop important stuff. Yep. I am the one who smashed cake in my newly wed husbands face. I THINK ITS FUNNY AND WILL NOT APOLOGIZE. It is. Its funny when something is ruined accidently. Its IRONY at its most alive and present state.

While dating Marc, we decided to make amazing smoothies. We lived in Hawaii. We bought a blender. We picked papaya. We bought bananas. We bought blueberries and strawberries (super expensive in HI), we cleaned mangoes and plantains. We were set. We chopped. We diced. We plugged in. We blended. Right before pouring into the 'frosted glasses' Marc pulled the blender off its base without securing the bottom. Our ridiculous smoothies spilled on the floor. All over the floor and cabinets. He was mad. I was in stiches. I thought it was hilarious. It was, it was IRONIC!
When someone has a decorated nursery in boy colors and they have a girl. I laugh. When someone young is bested by some old, yep thats me laughing.
When someone is allergic to cats and one comes and curls up on their lap. I snicker.



That said.

I really am a nice person.

Wait, is that ironic too?